Dr. Seuss Does Death
Don't pump me full of chemicals
and bury me in the ground.
Just toast me 'til I'm ashes
and spread me all around
Don't need a final resting place
for folks to come and mourn
I'd rather fertilize the Earth;
a part of me reborn
Into a flower or a tree,
or maybe just some grass.
Eternity inside a box?
I think I'll take a pass.
Thursday, July 28, 2005
Friday, July 15, 2005
OMG!
I forgot Soulard Farmer's Market, the whole Soulard area, Pevely Flea Market (hour drive to buy other people's crap)... Argh! I'm sure I'll think of more...
Downtown, including Union Station, the train depot turned shopping mall, get some Hodges Chili if you visit... Look at all the people wearing red for the Cardinals baseball game, I'm sure there will be one during your stay... There's just so much to do. How long were you planning on being here?
I forgot Soulard Farmer's Market, the whole Soulard area, Pevely Flea Market (hour drive to buy other people's crap)... Argh! I'm sure I'll think of more...
Downtown, including Union Station, the train depot turned shopping mall, get some Hodges Chili if you visit... Look at all the people wearing red for the Cardinals baseball game, I'm sure there will be one during your stay... There's just so much to do. How long were you planning on being here?
Thursday, July 14, 2005
For Sarsparilla
When you visit St. Louis, I highly recommend some of our totally free museums. We also have quite a few dirt-cheap museums. Most are less than $10. That's what, 6 Pounds?
Don't bother with the Arch, unless you like to look at a city from high up.
If you like art, The Art Museum (creative name, eh?)has a fantastic collection. Admission is free, although there is a fee for any special exhibits. The Art Museum is in Forest Park, which is kind of St. Louis' version of Central Park in New York. Forest Park is chock full of places to go, like The Muny, which offers 1,500 free seats for every show. They're not the best seats, so bring a pair of binoculars.
There's also The History Museum, The Jewel Box (an old greenhouse), and the Science Center.
The Zoo gets it's own paragraph, because the zoo is our pride and joy. Parking is $10 or so, but admission is (you guessed it) free! I went there a few weeks ago with my sister-in-law. We bought bracelets ($10) that let us in to all the pay attractions, all day long. So we rode the trains as long as we wanted, rode the carousel that's full of hand carved zoo critters, went on the air conditioned dinosaur ride, saw a (really crappy) movie, walked through a herd of butterflies, and visited the children's zoo. We were there for 6 hours! On a sad note, we're down to 1 polar bear. Both of his pit-mates dies recently. He looked very lonely. :(
If you're looking for something a bit more exciting, there's the City Museum; a touchy-feely museum that was once a factory. A mad man with some money bought the place and started building. It's still growing. Wear comfortable clothes, as you'll be crawling through caves and riding a 3 story slide. I particularly like the City Museum. Partly because everyone scoffed and said, "No one will pay to visit a museum!" and partly because they have a huge collection of St. Louis architecture. They've saved the facades and do-dads from practically every building that's been torn down. Since I grieve the loss of our old buildings, the architecture exhibit is my favorite place to go. The City Museum charges an admission fee, but their food prices are reasonable and the only other expenses are parking and the world aquarium. For $6, you can touch a non-stinging ray.
The height of excitement would be Six Flags St. Louis. Admission is $42, but they have specials all the time. Like any theme park, food is prohibitively expensive. Expect to spend $100 for admission and food. The thrill rides are thrilling, the other rides are fun, the water park is nice and wet... bring sunscreen. The water park hasn't been open long enough to grow decent shade trees. Six Flags is an easy 30 minute drive from Downtown St. Louis.
For that matter, just about everything is an easy 30 minute drive from downtown St. Louis. We're chock full of interesting places. The dog museum, the bowling hall of fame, horse racing, car racing, the delightfully haunted Lemp Mansion, the museum of transport for train fans, the Magic House for children, and so much more!
I haven't even touched on the people watching delights. Fun neighborhoods to shop and stare include the U City Loop, the Central West End (adjacent to Forest Park), Grand Center, and South Grand Avenue (I recommend Mokabee's Coffee House).
That's a month's worth of tourism, so take your pick!
We also have gambling boats.
You might wonder why so many of St. Louis' attractions are free, or super cheap. That's because we believe the arts should benefit everyone, regardless of income. A lot of our property taxes go toward our parks and museums so that everyone can enjoy them. The city is considering raising the property taxes again to support the St. Louis Symphony. When the measure finally comes up for a vote, I bet it'll pass. I'll happily pay another 2 cents per hundred dollars of valuation to maintain our world class symphony.
When you visit St. Louis, I highly recommend some of our totally free museums. We also have quite a few dirt-cheap museums. Most are less than $10. That's what, 6 Pounds?
Don't bother with the Arch, unless you like to look at a city from high up.
If you like art, The Art Museum (creative name, eh?)has a fantastic collection. Admission is free, although there is a fee for any special exhibits. The Art Museum is in Forest Park, which is kind of St. Louis' version of Central Park in New York. Forest Park is chock full of places to go, like The Muny, which offers 1,500 free seats for every show. They're not the best seats, so bring a pair of binoculars.
There's also The History Museum, The Jewel Box (an old greenhouse), and the Science Center.
The Zoo gets it's own paragraph, because the zoo is our pride and joy. Parking is $10 or so, but admission is (you guessed it) free! I went there a few weeks ago with my sister-in-law. We bought bracelets ($10) that let us in to all the pay attractions, all day long. So we rode the trains as long as we wanted, rode the carousel that's full of hand carved zoo critters, went on the air conditioned dinosaur ride, saw a (really crappy) movie, walked through a herd of butterflies, and visited the children's zoo. We were there for 6 hours! On a sad note, we're down to 1 polar bear. Both of his pit-mates dies recently. He looked very lonely. :(
If you're looking for something a bit more exciting, there's the City Museum; a touchy-feely museum that was once a factory. A mad man with some money bought the place and started building. It's still growing. Wear comfortable clothes, as you'll be crawling through caves and riding a 3 story slide. I particularly like the City Museum. Partly because everyone scoffed and said, "No one will pay to visit a museum!" and partly because they have a huge collection of St. Louis architecture. They've saved the facades and do-dads from practically every building that's been torn down. Since I grieve the loss of our old buildings, the architecture exhibit is my favorite place to go. The City Museum charges an admission fee, but their food prices are reasonable and the only other expenses are parking and the world aquarium. For $6, you can touch a non-stinging ray.
The height of excitement would be Six Flags St. Louis. Admission is $42, but they have specials all the time. Like any theme park, food is prohibitively expensive. Expect to spend $100 for admission and food. The thrill rides are thrilling, the other rides are fun, the water park is nice and wet... bring sunscreen. The water park hasn't been open long enough to grow decent shade trees. Six Flags is an easy 30 minute drive from Downtown St. Louis.
For that matter, just about everything is an easy 30 minute drive from downtown St. Louis. We're chock full of interesting places. The dog museum, the bowling hall of fame, horse racing, car racing, the delightfully haunted Lemp Mansion, the museum of transport for train fans, the Magic House for children, and so much more!
I haven't even touched on the people watching delights. Fun neighborhoods to shop and stare include the U City Loop, the Central West End (adjacent to Forest Park), Grand Center, and South Grand Avenue (I recommend Mokabee's Coffee House).
That's a month's worth of tourism, so take your pick!
We also have gambling boats.
You might wonder why so many of St. Louis' attractions are free, or super cheap. That's because we believe the arts should benefit everyone, regardless of income. A lot of our property taxes go toward our parks and museums so that everyone can enjoy them. The city is considering raising the property taxes again to support the St. Louis Symphony. When the measure finally comes up for a vote, I bet it'll pass. I'll happily pay another 2 cents per hundred dollars of valuation to maintain our world class symphony.
Friday, July 08, 2005
The Multi-Use Roof
St. Louis is great because it has a multitude of flat roofs. When you combine them with narrow gangways, you get a daring method of transportation. If you can leap 6 feet, you can traverse an entire block without touching the ground.
Since most of our flat roofed buildings have a facade; you can hide from the cops, sunt@n t0pl&ss, or bombard your friends. They're also a great place to shoot off fireworks.
A flat roof should be re-tarred every 5 years or so, which explains all those smelly tar trucks around the city.
When we moved in to the apartment next door to the bar, the roof was freshly tarred. When we moved out 7 years later, we left behind an assortment of tupperware that had been collecting drips. The landlord didn't do a damn thing to maintain the building.
When the downstairs neighbors broke our door, Mom was the one who fixed it.
When the Leisures threw a brick through our window, Mom was the one who patched it with duct tape.
And when kids pulled the mortar out from between the bricks so they could have something to throw at the busses, our neighbors were the ones who tuckpointed the place.
We gave that slumlord $300 a month for a leaky roof and an apartment we had to share with mice and cockroaches. And I'm a little bitter about it tonight.
Tenants have rights, and mom could have called the health department and gotten the place condemned; but then where would we live? So we tried to make the best of it. Eventually, we got rid of the mice and roaches through the judicious application of cats and Raid. For some reason that's beyond me, our landlord had carpeted the kitchen; so we put cardboard around the stove, to keep the carpet clean. (throw rugs? What, are you kidding me? We couldn't afford throw rugs! We needed that money for food and such.)
I have a picture of our cat, standing on the stained cardboard, with a bloody mouse in his mouth. we were so proud of him. He single handedly (clawed-ly?) rid our apartment of mice, and then he went after the roaches. He was the most efficient killer I've ever known.
St. Louis is great because it has a multitude of flat roofs. When you combine them with narrow gangways, you get a daring method of transportation. If you can leap 6 feet, you can traverse an entire block without touching the ground.
Since most of our flat roofed buildings have a facade; you can hide from the cops, sunt@n t0pl&ss, or bombard your friends. They're also a great place to shoot off fireworks.
A flat roof should be re-tarred every 5 years or so, which explains all those smelly tar trucks around the city.
When we moved in to the apartment next door to the bar, the roof was freshly tarred. When we moved out 7 years later, we left behind an assortment of tupperware that had been collecting drips. The landlord didn't do a damn thing to maintain the building.
When the downstairs neighbors broke our door, Mom was the one who fixed it.
When the Leisures threw a brick through our window, Mom was the one who patched it with duct tape.
And when kids pulled the mortar out from between the bricks so they could have something to throw at the busses, our neighbors were the ones who tuckpointed the place.
We gave that slumlord $300 a month for a leaky roof and an apartment we had to share with mice and cockroaches. And I'm a little bitter about it tonight.
Tenants have rights, and mom could have called the health department and gotten the place condemned; but then where would we live? So we tried to make the best of it. Eventually, we got rid of the mice and roaches through the judicious application of cats and Raid. For some reason that's beyond me, our landlord had carpeted the kitchen; so we put cardboard around the stove, to keep the carpet clean. (throw rugs? What, are you kidding me? We couldn't afford throw rugs! We needed that money for food and such.)
I have a picture of our cat, standing on the stained cardboard, with a bloody mouse in his mouth. we were so proud of him. He single handedly (clawed-ly?) rid our apartment of mice, and then he went after the roaches. He was the most efficient killer I've ever known.
Sunday, July 03, 2005
Hey, St. Louis!
We're having a little bit of a drought here, and tomorrow is the 4th of July. Which means cheap fireworks will be lighting the sky for the next few nights. If you don't water your lawns; they'll be lighting your grass, too.
I know it's a hassle, but you might want to water your roof, too. It's been a long time since St. Louis was so dry... But trust me; debris in your gutters or laying on your roof will catch fire.
We're having a little bit of a drought here, and tomorrow is the 4th of July. Which means cheap fireworks will be lighting the sky for the next few nights. If you don't water your lawns; they'll be lighting your grass, too.
I know it's a hassle, but you might want to water your roof, too. It's been a long time since St. Louis was so dry... But trust me; debris in your gutters or laying on your roof will catch fire.
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